They say that Money Is The Root Of All Evil and that Money Can’t Make You Happy, and while in many ways this is true, I think that anyone who has a shortage of money would strongly disagree.
There are precious few celebrities or sports stars who seem to have an idyllic life. While they might live in a mansion, have expensive cars, be able to travel anywhere and to do anything that they want, without a loving partner and true friends who want them for themselves and not for their money, they will never be truly happy.
So often these abundantly wealthy people end up losing everything, throw their lives away with partying and drugs like Charlie Sheen, or get into trouble with the law like Mel Gibson or Lindsay Lohan.
But it’s not those who have more money than sense that I wanted to write about, it’s those who have enough to live on, but not enough to make them happy.
My wife and I can be counted in that group, since while money is tight, we are able to pay our bills every month, but for reasons I will explain, we are struggling emotionally because we don’t have enough money to be able to see our children, and that is difficult for us both.
To cut a long story short, if that is possible, when I was still living in Florida we tried to get a visa so that my fiancee could spend a year with me, the application got rejected, and it made it very difficult for her to visit the USA at all.
I also lost my job while we were trying to sort the visa problem out, and we therefore decided that it would be better if I moved back to England, since by then her daughter was going to have her first grandchild.
That meant I would have to leave my two daughters in Florida with my ex wife, and to not see them very often, but I hoped to be able to go back twice a year at least.
A year after returning to England and having got married in the meantime, my wife’s daughter was also having visa problems, this time because she was married to a South African. Despite their having been married for five years and having a baby as well, it didn’t look like the visa situation would be resolved, and so they moved to South Africa.
With my current income being about the same as I was earning 20 years ago, and my wife taking a 20% cut in income due to the recession, between us we can barely afford one trip a year, either to Florida or South Africa, and this is the root of our misery, not being able to see our kids at all.
The cost of flights just seem to keep going up and up, and with my wife working in the school system, she can only take vacations during the school breaks, which is the most expensive time of year.
So while we do have enough money to live on, we will not be happy unless we find a way to be able to see our children at least once a year. Seeing them on Skype using the webcam is one thing, but it’s a poor substitute for real hugs and kisses isn’t it.
So just put us in that category of people where having more money would indeed make us happy. Material things are one thing, but being able to see your loved ones when you want makes you the wealthiest people in the world.
16 thoughts on “M Is For Money Can It Make You Happy”
Money can sometimes bring the best smiles…:) Great to meet you via A-Z, and hope you find a way to be with your kids oftener!
That’s really sad. I hope things work out for you. I couldn’t bear not to see my children.
I firmly believe that whoever said money can’t buy happiness must have been a wealthy asshole. I’m sorry but money can buy happiness. Every time I buy a new book I’m happy. Doesn’t it make you happy when you are able to buy something you like? Doesn’t it make you happy to know that your lights are going to stay on for another month? I’m pretty happy when I know I have enough money to buy food to eat and money makes me ecstatic when it gathers in bunches and buys me things like vacations and a new car. Pshaw…money can’t buy happiness. Malarky I say!
Money alone will not make you happy, but it goes a long way in smoothing out the bumps in road of life. In my longish life I’ve known miserable people with all they money they could want and very poor people living happy. I believe and trust in luck in circumstances rather than money. I wish your family extra good luck in coming together.
Pam – pirate knitting
Hi Tony .. money certainly makes life easier and you’d be a lot happier if you could both see your children regularly – that does make sense.
Life has its moments of being not easy .. but I’m sure things will come right – we have to be optimists .. just for now we have to celebrate what we can do .. look after yourselves .. at least we have Skype now etc .. and you can see them – 20 years ago .. wouldn’t have been able to do that .. or email etc .. it’s counting our blessings too – but I can see your children matter so much.
Cheers Hilary
Tony – sorry – money isn’t the root of all evil! The “love of” money is the root of all evil. (1 Timothy 6:10) cheers 🙂
Good answer Michele, very true.
My son has to be away from his family for a while too. My heart breaks that he can’t be with them (or me) very often, but while he’s a U.S. Marine, he has to stay where he is. Skype helps, but you’re right, it’s just not the same as physical contact. My latest A-Z Challenge blog is here: http://myheartblogstoyou.blogspot.com/2011/04/misunderstandings-i-know-you-didnt-say.html
I can’t agree with either of the statements – that the money – or the love of money – is the root of all evil. I love it every time I find the Squidoo payday note on my dashboard!
In my opinion, in western civilization money more or less equals freedom and things we buy with money do make us feel better – even though only for a short time sometimes. Having enough for being able to do anything and to go anywhere is definitely my preference, along with having more than I can spend – at all times.
As soon as I submit this comment I’ll go and visualize you and Debby having enough dough to travel to South Africa and Florida as often as you like, without having to even think about the cost of the trip. The two of you are doing great, you’ve overcame loads of seemingly impossible obstacles – and therefore your current reality seems to me like just another amusing bounce down – before you bounce back up – higher than ever. Wishing you all the best, from my heart! 🙂
Thanks Daria. It definitely does help to have enough money to do what you NEED to do.
Wouldn’t it be nice to have enough, so that the stress of worrying about money was eliminated.
Nice post. I don’t want to be rich, but it would sure be nice to have enough that you wouldn’t have to worry from paycheck to paycheck.
Money makes me happy when I have enough to get by. It makes me unhappy when I work every waking hour to get it and it makes me unhappy when no matter how hard I work, I don’t have enough.
I lost my job too, and we are living on 25% of what I used to make. I am actually happier than I’ve been in a long time but we are living very differently too. We don’t have a lot of debt – no mortgage or vehicle payments thankfully.
Some of my friends are losing everything they own. They were living week to week with no savings at all. It is really sad to watch.
I am grateful we were in a good position to start with. Now it is about changing careers in our mid forty’s and enjoying life a little more, really doing the things that are the most important to us, and letting the other stuff slide.
About 15 years ago my parents lived in Indonesia. I would talk to them twice a year, and the phone always had a delay on it so you were talking over each other. It was horrible – couldn’t wait to hang up. I think Skype is a great thing for those of us that want to visit “in person” that live far away. I know it is tough to not see family but sometimes that makes the little time spent together even more precious.
I don’t believe money will buy you happiness – but the lack of it can sure cause some misery. I like to believe hubby and I are happy people – but I’ve spent one too many days crying in the grocery store parking lot worrying about how I can possibly buy enough food for a month with $20. Does it make me happy to see a $17 Squidoo payday? That makes it $37 to buy food for a month – you bet that makes me happy! Do I need to win a million in the lottery to be happy? No, not at all (not that I would mind – but I’d probably give at least half of it away to other people I know who need it – like you guys). Thank you for making a valid point.
I know how difficult it can be, my daughters said again today, We miss grandma and grandpa but with school and flight prices we are lucky to spend the time with them that we do. It’s so hard being away from my oldest children and parents too sometimes.
That would be tough not to be able to see the family. We don’t get to see family often either. Great post.